brickhouseracing

I generally stick to the self checkout line at the grocery store. Today, though, they were down for service. So, I went through the full-service cashier/bagger line.

The woman bagging my groceries (Dora, according to her name tag) and I had the following conversation:

Her: You’re so beautiful and your skin is so nice, why do you have to do that? (she waves at her lip/nose area)

Me: I didn’t say anything, I just ignored her

Her: I know, I always say that to you when you don’t use the self-checkout

(I can’t remember the last time I used a full-service line or talked to this woman if I did)
Me: Yeah, that’s why I usually stick to the self-checkout, but it’s not an option today.

(Cashier laughs uncomfortably)

Her: Blah, Blah, Blah…

At this point, I bite my toungue. You see, Ms. Dora is overweight. I am sorely tempted to say something along the lines of, “You’re such a beautiful woman, why do you have to consume excessive numbers of calories and live a sedentary lifestyle?”

I took my groceries and left.

You know what? I have piercings. Ears, labret, and nostril.
You know what else? I have tattoos, also. Starting from the earliest…

Tribal calf band: My high school graduation present to myself. I picked it off the wall at Underground Art. It’s my least favorite, and I’ll likely get it covered up with something more creative in the future, but, no, I don’t regret getting it.

Wings: They’re just below the anterior waistline, and aren’t for general public viewing.I can assure you they look nice, though.

Phoenix: It covers the top half of my back, and is a representation of the general pattern of my entire life thus far.

Revelations Dragon: This one was inspired by a late-night radio sermon given by Jerry Falwell. I heard it on the way home from a bike race.

The Dragon is not finished yet (it’s more complete than the posted photo, but still not fully filled in). With my recent change in employment combined with monthly payments to The Wizard, I just haven’t had the cash to get the work done.

That’s besides the point, though.

I think I’m going to start criticizing people’s choices in accessorizing themselves in ways that I don’t approve of:

Hey, lady, you have such gorgeous salt & pepper gray hair, why do you color it?
Dude- your pecs and shoulders are gorgeous, why do you cover them up with that horrible Abercrombie T-shirt??
Wow, man, that a Corvette makes you look like you’re a douchebag having a midlife crisis, why do you drive it???
Ya know, that button-down shirt makes you look like a working stiff who hates his life.

Or, I could just mind my own business and take comfort in the fact that choices in self-accessorizing are what makes people different from one another. I suggest you do the same. Or not. It’s whatever you want to do.