In an ironic twist of events, my legs have somehow disconnected from my aching sacrum ans well as my brain’s sudden meltdown into a quivering heap of lost hope in humanity. During the past two days of training, my system has done a 180 from it’s normal function of brain not listening to whining legs. It’s like the exact opposite of this:
I appreciate everyone’s concern and suggestions in my previous post. Group rides are great, and the atmosphere of the one I went on last week was incredibly accepting and fun. They’d be an excellent way of getting back into road riding with less worry about drivers “not seeing me.” However, a coach/training plan isn’t usually compatible with a group ride, and, as long as I’m physically able to do so, I have to set my meltdowns aside and get on the HTFU train to improving my fitness.
So, my legs have taken over like they’ve got a mind of their own. It’s akin having Sargeant Hartman in my quads. I’m hoping that when the Ouachita Challenge rolls around in a little less than 2 weeks, I’ll be healed enough that I can put them to good use and negotiate the steep and rocky parts of the Ouachita Trail. If not, I’m gonna have a bad time. If it all works out, I can pull off a win at a race where I’ve had plenty of bad luck in the past. Last year’s winner, Carey Lowery, is not on the entry list, but Jessica Rawlings, who beat me by minutes last year, is going to be there.
In an attempt to not have repeated breakdowns while road riding, yesterday I took to waving and saying “thank you” to every driver that took care by slowing down, giving space, and waiting until the road ahead was clear when passing. It took my mind off of the other 50 that passed too close and/or fast on blind hills & whatnot. Focus on the positive, right?
Gotta get some Andrea Rides up and going.
I feel ya dear… I don’t have a solution but … just know that even this grizzled old roadie gets the traffic heebie jeebies on a regular basis… sometimes it’s just a feeling, like “oh man I don’t want to be on this road right now” even if it’s the same road I’ve done a million times with no problem.
Friday evening rush hours in particular… I head for the back streets… too much angst in the air.
Get a mirror? At least then you’ll have the ability to relax when there’s nobody back there.
Also… if I’m doing a structured workout on the road, I prefer relatively short circuits over long rides. That way I know the traffic, know the road surfaces, the wind, any elevation, so I can do a proper interval. I’ve got several of varying length etc depending on what kind of intervals I’m doing.
I also like to wave and friendly gesture all the motorists… I figure, most roadies are oblivious jerks, so I’ll do my small part to remind people that some of us can act like grown ups.
another alternative: throw the bike in the car and drive out to BFE where there’s zero traffic.
it’s scary that the uncaring drivers so outnumber the others
Really sorry to read what’s happened and how it’s affecting you. I got hit super hard from behind a while back, leaving me out cold in a busy road momentarily. I couldn’t cross the road on foot for a bit afterwards, much less ride a bike in traffic. I guess the following are suggestions from my experience and nothing more, as everyone’s recovery/coping strategies are different.
Geting super anxious on the bike is an entirely natural response to something pretty frightening that’s occured. Keep getting back on the bike – like I really need to tell you to do this anyway! If you’ve gotta stop, do so, but try and concentrate on your breathing for a bit and move your focus away from the feelings if they’re getting overwhelming (you’ll already have good breathing control from riding competitively so use this here). Then get back on as soon as you can. Likewise when you’re riding, as soon as you become aware of the feelings try and become mindful of your breathing, different muscles in your legs, etc and focus on this for a bit (hey, I’m obviously not saying don’t think about the traffic at all, there’s clearly a right/wrong time and place for this!). I’m going to +1 other posters who’ve suggested yoga or anything that’s improves that promotes mindfulness in general. That said, you can also play to your strengths at the same time; you’re clearly focused, resilient, driven. You can use this to increase your exposure to what’s currently feeling pretty difficult. Push yourself. Start off with bites size chunks of what is scaring you and keep gradually buidling up. As I said keep getting back on the bike. I’m pretty sure this will be enough, but set yourself a review date in your head, say 4-6 weeks. If the anxious feelings aren’t going even a bit I’d suggest speaking to someone perhaps for something brief and focused like cognitive behavourial therapy. Thing of it as brain physio/training!
Hope all the above will be taken in the spirit intended. Some mornings it’s tough to get on the bike and it’s looking at a couple of blogs on line including yours that gets me up and out. I’m hoping that I can repay you a little here.
J.